As most of you may know, my father-in-law, Cecil Jones died in his home on Tuesday, Aug. 19. He would have celebrated his 62nd birthday on Wednesday, Aug. 27. We found out almost five months ago that he had cancer, and it was terminal. He told the family and he was optimistic. He did one round of chemo and one of radiation. It seemed to all go down hill from there. Afterwards he decided that he would not have anymore treatment, and several weeks later the doctors told him that there just wasn't much more that they could do. As a Christian you are supposed to know to put it in God's hands. It is in times like these that faith is tested. It is hard not to ask why? why him? Why now? And I did ask those questions.
You always know that must be so hard on a family. You just don't ever think that it will touch you so closely. I know that I am not his child, but my husband and I have been together for nine years. I was also his neighbor for about the first 14 years of my life, give or take a few. In that five months we all watched a man that loved to work, garden, cook, sew, and laugh become unable to do even the smallest task. It became hard for him to eat, see, hear, and talk. I say these things only to let everyone know that it IS ok now. He IS in a better place. He DOESN'T hurt anymore. You can say that you are prepared all that you want, but NOTHING can prepare you for when it actually happens.
I was there the day that it happened, but we had left at about 5:30 in the morning. James went in to see him right before we left. I didn't want to go see him because I knew that it would upset me. I had meetings that day and I didn't want to have the image of him so sick, in my head all day. I feel so selfish. That was my last opportunity to see him and I didn't. That has been the hardest thing for me to deal with.
James is doing ok. He said it best when he said that there are things worse than dying and his dad had it. He loved his father very much. I have Cecil to thank for making my husband the way that he is. You couldn't find two people that were more alike. They could do anything from baking a cake to building a house! They both had the same laid back attitude, but watch out when they finally blow. I remember walking in the house on several occasions and Cecil would look up and simply say "hmmm." Then I would walk from the living room to Jim's room and he would look up and also just say "hmmm."I know that probably doesn't mean much to anyone else, but it puts a smile on my face.
I just want to thank everyone for cards, thoughts, prayers, and HUGS. I know that it is very hard to know what to say, but you need to know that you don't have to say anything. Just a look, hug, or sorry to hear is all that I need. It means so much to know that I have friends that mean it when they say, "let me know if you need anything." We really are appreciative. Thank you again for your support. Please keep the Jones family in your prayers.
5 comments:
Amee...I have beening thinking about you guys, but started school yesterday and didn't take the time to write...I'm so sorry!!!! I hope you guys are doing ok. If you need anything, I know I'm not too close distance wise, but seriously don't hesitate to ask! Tell James I'm thinking about him too!
Elana
God bless your faith built attitude at a time when you are filled with sadness. We're here if you need us...I know you've heard that from 100 people who know you better than me, but I mean it.
And oh how thankful you are for those photos? Thinking of you in the next couple of days and the holidays down the road. Love, Andrea
you did a great job writing that post. i am sure it was hard to write but you did an outstanding job. it brought tears to my eyes. i have only known cecil for a few years but he was a great guy. we will see you tonight and like i said b4 if you need anything call. love ya!
Miss Amee- I have thought constantly about you and James the last few days. I haven't called, because sometimes, there just aren't enough words and it's good to just spend time with family. I am inspired by your faith because sometimes it is easier to just ask why and not look at the bigger picture! Know that we are thinking about you and miss you. We will see you tonight!
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